Vent

I'm going to vent for a moment.

Because of a friendship that went sour, I now have to tip toe around at work and church for fear that I may run into this person or cause them to speak poorly about me to others that we both know. I stopped all of my communication attempts back in November per her request (if you read my other blog, you know how horrid my November was). I still miss the friendship we had before things went sour. I'm still unsure what caused the sourness in the first place, but I know that after witnessing the recent behavior of this individual, I have no intention of pursuing a close relationship with them unless God prompts me otherwise. I honestly still pray for this person and want them to heal from their past hurts. We confided in each other about our pasts and our struggles so I'm thankful I'm able to pray for this person in specific ways.

Anyway, I just hate the fact that I have to be careful around her friends for fear that they know about the bitterness she (may still) hold for me. I hate that we can't even say hello to each other when we pass. I hate that I'm so bitter with how she easily discarded our friendship with no communication as to why. I don't hate her, I don't even dislike her. I know that something must be going on with her to make her do this to me and the countless others that she was once close to. Something is wrong and I want to help her through it -  but she's rejected my help. I've mourned the friendship and moved on.

Alright, I'm done venting now.

Mother's Day

(post from 5/6/11)

It's kinda sort my first Mother's Day!

weird..

To start the wonderful weekend, my wonderful baby daddy bought me flowers! His awesomness is heightened because of the stress that is going on at work:


I work in Higher Education Administration at a large University (the 8th largest school in the US). One of my major tasks, on top of managing 20+ employees and their duties, is to help plan Commencement. It takes the entire year to plan all of the details that go into one day (i.e. vendors, transport, "props", conferrals, diplomas, locations, pre-emptive strikes, website updates, communicating with staff, faculty, and students both digitally and in hard copy, etc). It's a whirlwind of AHHHHH that comes to head in the final two weeks leading up to the actual ceremonies. These flowers blissfully arrived to my office on the Friday of the first week of AHHHHH. My husband is freakin' awesome.

Now as we approach the second week, I am trying to eat as often as possible and stay as stress-less as I can under the circumstances of people not reading/doing what they're supposed to read/do. I love my staff and they are wonderful - I am so blessed to have them! They've been helping me maintain my sanity while picking up on ways they can help prepare everything.

On another note, Commencement also collides with the end of term excitement of final grades, exams, and Summer/Fall registration. Praise God for all of Jesus' little helpers!

Word Play

This may not be the blog for this post, but humor me. My brain is fried.

There is a difference between the "sex" and "gender" of an individual. Even though they are used interchangeably in everyday American conversation, they are medically very different. For example, in June we will learn the sex of our baby (male or female). The gender of our baby will not be known until their personality comes out (masculine or feminine). Ultimately, one can be a masculine female or a feminine male. Although to make sure I don't sound like a pretentious d-bag, I let it slide when people ask, "when do you find out the gender!!"

However, I will continue to dismiss resumes with typos and spelling errors.

13 Weeks

My kid is the size of a peach :)

Nausea is subsiding - I haven't barfed in 4 days!!! That's a new record!! Slurpees are still a constant companion. I still love dairy but can't eat as much meat as before. Steak is starting to get gross, chicken is a little better, but peanutbutter is tasting more edible each day.

My belly seems to be on schedule, too judging by this artists rendering of a behbeh inside a belleh. My next appointment is a week and a half from now. This weekend will be super fun- I get to see my family and go maternity clothes shoppping with mom and Lisa! yay!!



For all of my prego updates, please visit my other blog at http://askaprego.blogspot.com/

WOOO!

I've been bad at updating this blog - most of my energy is spent updating Trying For Life. I'm now in my second trimester and am enjoying every moment, from the weight gain to the barf - it's a beautiful reminder of God's grace that allowed us to get pregnant in the first place!

Things are going so well for us. Financially, we've been able to put money into savings each month which is something we hadn't been able to do since we first got married. We are so thankful for our church body, our home, our cat, our everything! God is great and life is good.

We're PREGNANT!

Hello friends!

I am overjoyed and shocked to announce that Jonathan and I are expecting a baby in October! We went through a long and difficult season of trying and we are thrilled!

I had been keeping a blog chronicling our journey to conception and now to parenthood. It's called Trying For Life and it is now open to anyone who wants to read it. I do not censor myself in the blog - it is full of frustration, sarcasm, hope, medical jargon, and personal experiences.


Here is a glimpse into our story:
We decided to start trying around Christmas of 2009. The blog itself started in February of 2010 when we thought we were pregnant - I misread a pregnancy test and started the blog within hours of the good news. A few hours after starting the blog, I re-tested with another brand and it was negative. (I never thought I'd be one of those women who would misread a pregnancy test, but turns out its a lot easier than it seems!)

Our town is a young town with conservative values, which means people get pregnant all the flippin' time. Everytime I logged onto Facebook it seemed that someone else was either announcing they were pregnant or just popped out another kid. I was especially frustrated with those younger than us or who had been married for less time (or not married at all) who were having children before us. I started charting, taking my temperature, and becoming overly aware of my ovulation, but nothing was working. In November, we had a chemical pregnancy which is essentially a very early miscarriage. It was devastating and we were more determined than ever to do whatever it took to conceive. We had testing, samples, extra doctor visits, and nothing happened.

Finally, at the point of surrendering everything to God and letting Him control our futures entirely, God allowed us to conceive!! Looking back, we wouldn't have wanted it any other way. Every bit of this pregnancy, from the nausea to the weight gain, are things that I am so thankful for and will not take for granted.

Good sign

Jonathan and I just had lunch at Fridays and the server asked if we needed separate checks. Apparently we were having so much fun that we didn't look married!


I think that's a great sign of a healthy marriage.

Ultimate Playlist

I made one of my new favorite road trip playlists:

1. Scenes from an Italian Restaurant - Billy Joel
2. Accidentally In Love - Counting Crows
3. King of Anything - Sara Bareilles
4. Who Says You Can't Go Home - Bon Jovi
5. Motown Song - Rod Stewart
6. I'm Alright - Phil Vassar
7. Feelin' The Same Way - Norah Jones
8. Suddenly I See - KT Tunstall
9. Come On Over - Christina Aguilera
10. The Two Of Us - NSYNC
11. Let the Music Get Down In Your Soul - Marc Broussard
12. La Vie En Rose - Pomplamoose
13. Falling For the First Time - Barenaked Ladies
14. Roly Poly - The Little Willies
15. Hope For Me Yet - Marc Broussard
16. Anthony - Nickel Creek

Presidential Nerdom

I'm geeking out over this graph:

http://www.creditsesame.com/blog/net-worth-of-american-presidents-vs-national-debt/

Friends

"Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another,

'What! You too? I thought I was the only one.'" - C.S. Lewis

I am blessed to have amazing friends that think I am interesting, funny, and worth loving. Even when I am feeling worthless, they still want to be my friend. I am blessed with these sisters and I am looking forward to even more laughs, tears, and adventures!